2002-04-07
11:39 p.m.

You don't even KNOW how much I hate you. You don't even know it! I hate you more than I have ever hated anyone else, and that is a lot of hate I can tell you, you nipple welt!

You see this? HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE!!!! You see all that hate? All that hate, every bit of it is for YOU!

You remember of course, don't you Addie, or should I call you Ad DIE? Oh, you remember all right. I was just minding my own business, sitting at the counter in Dunkin' Donuts at the bus station and you came in all beautiful and shit. You sat down next to me and I was crying, and you said what's the matter and I said everybody hates me so I hate them back and I was gonna show them by running away. And you said, "I'm blowing this shit hole too. I guess a girl like you could probably use a change of scenery. Right?"

And I said, "What do you mean a girl like me?"

And you said, "Well, just look at ya. You got that limp, you're picking lice off your skin and flicking them into the donut bins, got 'MULLET' carved into your leg there. You're a wreck. No offense."

So I jumped on you and I had you pinned to the floor and I tried to scoop your eyes out with a plastic spork, but it kept breaking and then men came and got me off you and they slapped me a little, but I kicked them back and got a way and ran to my bus.

IT WAS MY BUS YOU FREAK WITH THE FREAKISHLY FREAKY NOSE FREAKING RING GOD I HATE YOU AND YOUR DANGEROUS JEWELRY YOU'RE JUST A SHAVED PUBE IN MY DRAIN THAT'S ALL YOU ARE!

So I'm minding my own business just trying to go greyhound and you get on the same bus as me. IT WAS MY BUS FIRST FIST-FUCKER! I WAS THERE FIRST! And you saw me in the back by the urinal and you came up to me and told me you were sorry and I said sorry and you said can I sit here and I said yeah so you sat down and I thought you were my friend.

And we were talking and shit and you told me that you wanted to go to Alaska because you have family there and I said, I'm going to Alaska because it's as far away from the fuckers as I can get and we laughed and laughed.

So we laughed for hours and we were about half way there and the bathroom was pretty rank and we were right by it and you said, "WOO! You're kind of gassy today!" every time somebody opened the door. And that was hilarious because it wasn't me it was the bathroom and you KNEW that so it was a joke.

And then, when it got dark and most people were sleeping you started asking me if I knew anything funny to do with farts and I said, "no." And then you asked me if I have ever lit my farts and pulled out a lighter. And I said, "no."

So you hung your ass over the seat into the aisle and you said, "all you do is hold the lighter like this and then you fart and--" and then the most beautiful blue fire came out of your ass and it was spectacular! And then you said, "why don't you try it."

And I said, "I'm afraid. I don't want to get burned."

So you said, "Well, here. Just wet your skirt a bit with this and the wet will protect you from the fire. Wet things don't burn!"

So I did. I sprayed your mystery stuff on my pants FOR PROTECTION ONLY and I tried it. We traded places, you planter's wart. We traded places and I hung my ass over the edge of the seat and I lit a fart and it was beautiful.

Until my vintage polyester daisy and smiley face mini that I got at the thrift went up in a huge ball of fire. TAHT WAS HAIR SPRAY YOU CUNT! HAIR SPRAY! HAIR SPRAY BURNS, FUCKING BITCH! BURNS LIKE YOUR FUCKING UGLY FLESH WHEN YOU GO TO HELL FOR WHAT YOU DID TO ME! IT BURNS LIKE THAT, YOU ANAL FUNGUS! IT BURNS JUST LIKE THAT!

So, my ass was on fire and you said, "Here. Spray this to put it out!" So I sprayed more hair spray on the blaze which made the fire worse! And I started running around on the bus, lighting the seats on fire, but accidentally because I wasn't lighting them on fire with a match. I was lighting them on fire with my flaming ass!

And later when we were all standing in the snow wathching the bus burn I heard you say "I don't know her name. I just know she's the crazy who tried to pluck out my eyes in the donut shop." I HEARD YOU SAY THAT TO THE DRIVER!

And now I don't have anymore eyebrows and the doctor says THEY WON'T EVER NEVER EVER NEVER EVER GROW BACK AND IT'S ALL YOUR FUCKING FAULT YOU FLAT CHESTED SEA CUCUMBER OF DOOM!!!!

And that's why I HATE you HATE you HATE you so much and I always will! Fucking whore!

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